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zana16A DAY IN THE LIFE OF JOE REPUBLICAN
Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his
morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging
liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards. With his first swallow
of coffee, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to
take because some stupid commie liberal fought to insure their safety and
that they work as advertised.
All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical
plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid
medical insurance -- now Joe gets it, too. He prepares his morning breakfast,
bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal
fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.
In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is
properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents
because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on
his body and how much it contained. Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a
deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko
liberal fought for laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks
to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It
saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some
fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which
gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.
Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical
benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy
liberal union members fought and died for these working standards. Joes employer
pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want h is employees
to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll
get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal
didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune.
Its noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some
bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some godless
liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the
banking system before the Great Depression.
Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market
federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the
government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money
over his lifetime.
Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his
farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among
the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car
safety standards. He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third
generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration
because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have
electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it
didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.
He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on
Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking,
cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe
wouldn't have to.
Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk
show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are
good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought
against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day.
Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our
lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of
themselves, just like I have."
For peace, security, civil rights, affordable health insurance for all, more
and better-paying jobs, cleaner air and water, support Kerry-Edwards and
liberal, progressive candidates for Congress.
Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his
morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging
liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards. With his first swallow
of coffee, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to
take because some stupid commie liberal fought to insure their safety and
that they work as advertised.
All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical
plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid
medical insurance -- now Joe gets it, too. He prepares his morning breakfast,
bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal
fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.
In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is
properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents
because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on
his body and how much it contained. Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a
deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko
liberal fought for laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks
to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It
saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some
fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which
gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.
Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical
benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy
liberal union members fought and died for these working standards. Joes employer
pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want h is employees
to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll
get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal
didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune.
Its noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some
bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some godless
liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the
banking system before the Great Depression.
Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market
federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the
government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money
over his lifetime.
Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his
farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among
the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car
safety standards. He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third
generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration
because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have
electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it
didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.
He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on
Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking,
cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe
wouldn't have to.
Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk
show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are
good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought
against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day.
Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our
lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of
themselves, just like I have."
For peace, security, civil rights, affordable health insurance for all, more
and better-paying jobs, cleaner air and water, support Kerry-Edwards and
liberal, progressive candidates for Congress.
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thanks
Date: 2004-10-25 12:26 am (UTC)go to the clip labled "this land" there's one questionable pic and it has a soundtrack, so make sure that you're alone, it's funny!