(no subject)

[zana16]

Smith Convocation rocked, as usual. JMG Hall threatened to come down under the influence of thousands of girls yelling, stomping, dancing, etc. And as President Christ said, the speakers didn't have to imagine the audience in their underwear, as most of them already were. Our house's theme was Madonna/rockstar, and I actually dressed up. It took me awhile to convince myself that I really could wear just the corset without a shirt under it. Most girls I know don't have any problem showing a bit of cleavage, but I belong in the Victorian age; deep V-neck shirts are as close as I get. Also wore heels (ouch) and pleather coat and tight jeans. Felt very camp.

Saw my Beth today. And Sonora. And I got a job. A well-paying job, at that. Nude modeling for the art department is the only work-study job that pays more than tutoring French, apparently. I went to the interview (having completely forgotten about the appointment yesterday, but she was nice about it) and she said, your application is very impressive, I get the impression you've never had trouble with anything. I managed not to burst out laughing at that.

I really like one of the first-years on my floor, but the only problem is that her bed is directly opposite mine on the other side of the wall. So I feel like I can't have sex in my room, and what is the point of having a single if not to be able to have sex or walk around naked?

Saw Liz. Allowed myself a whole 7 seconds of limpet-like behavior before backing off. Why do I always do this? When I like and admire someone and want to really get to know them, I'm too afraid to invest the emotional energy. First it was Gina on the pedestal, then... we won't talk about that... then Erin, now Liz. I avoid them and get hostile just cause I want so badly to be friends that I couldn't take the rejection without knowing exactly why they reject me. And it's just certain people. Almost everybody else, I can just be casually friendly and then see, and some of them have turned out to be my best friends, but not with the one person... Nevermind.

Classes start tomorrow. I want the Boston Globe to start coming regularly. I want my comix and my crossword. I want my independent study course all set up and in progress. I want my phone to work. I want someone to cuddle with....

Curse these moodswings.

Comments

[hedy.livejournal.com]

Were you wearing a hat? I was looking in the mass of boobies Talboteers for you.

[zana16.livejournal.com]

Okay, second try on that reply. I was wearing a very small hat, light green and square-shaped. I like it, but it's not showy. What house are you in, again? My memory has been playing tricks on me.

[hedy.livejournal.com]

Chapin.

[ambermoon.livejournal.com]

I hope you're not still uncomfortable around me; I'd like to see more of you this year.

[zana16.livejournal.com]

Nope... have moved on to Liz! Probably because I actually talked--well, wrote--so you became less scary. Which brings me to the question... when is the first SSFFS meeting? I'm going to try and actually go to a few meetings this year.

[(Anonymous)]

so you're modeling nude for the art department? um... since when have you abandoned your body consciousness issues?

[zana16.livejournal.com]

Hah. I wish. No, I'm tutoring French.